I'm in a relationship with a little yellow rubber man

Plus points:

• He isn't needy or clingy & he doesn't call you at every oppurtunity just to find out what you're up to - in fact he plays hard to get
• He's a great listener & his eyes won't glaze over even after an hour of ranting (- it was something realli important you had to get off your chest!)
• He always makes time for you when you most need him
• He doesn't protest when you flick the football over to watch Grey's Anatomy
• He doesn't have a beer belly & his toes are hair free
• He won't screw you over or break your heart
• You can stretch his arms & legs really far which is strangely quite therapeutic
• I get to share him with my best friend & our 3some isn't awkward